Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Almost doesn't count...

No it's not just a song by Brandy.... it's a mantra for life. Almost really doesn't cut it. That's how I've been going for the past few weeks. Almost finishing my homework....almost acting like I care. Am I supposed to even care anymore? It seems that's the trend these days. SO maybe I just got the memo a little later than everyone else.

My birthday was a couple weeks ago and my brother got me an awesome gift- the first season of Quantum Leap- one of my all-time favorite shows. Not to mention Sam Beckett is f-ing hot. The guy has 6 doctorates and he's young enough to still be 'poster on the wall' worthy....if I was still 16 and still had posters of hotties on my walls. Anyway, I had never really seen the first episode and it definitely explains a lot. Take a string (shoelaces will work) and designate one end as your birth and the other as your death. Now, between those two points are millions of other events that occurred during your life. Now connect the two ends and then roll it into a ball. What happens? Your life is in a loop and now all the points on the continuum are mixed up and out of sequence. Now that would be a kick ass way to live your life. Live in sequential order long enough to get an education and some life experience, and then one day in your late 20's early 30's you get to go back and relive some of them, or even get jumbled within someone else's 'string' and get to help them make better decisions to improve their life! Not to mention we'd all get a cool hologram friend to tell us what's up and how to accomplish whatever we're meant to do while we're leaping to another time. This may sound selfish, but there isn't a whole lot in my life that I'd personally go back and change or relive, just because all of that made me who I am today, but someone else may not see it as such- just like I think I could go back in a few people's lives and make a couple quick adjustments and they'd be much better off. At least in my opinion.
I would love to explore time travel and 'second chances.' I know for a fact that there are some things that I would change- but they're minor things, like the way a relationship with one of my first loves turned out (yes there CAN be more than one, if you count Jr. High and High School) or a dumb outfit I wore, something I said, and even the people I chose to hang out with. I'd just like to have one of those Christmas Carol moments where you get to see how things would have turned out if you'd made a different choice. Hell, I may be working towards Med school instead if I had made a couple different choices. But hindsight is 20/20. How cool would it be to have foresight?! Then you'd definitely see that bitch coming a mile awhile way before she slept with your boyfriend or keyed your car...
Ultimately, I almost made these decisions that I now wish I would've made or wouldn't have made in the first place. I almost thought about being a bio/chem major. I almost went to a bigger school. I even almost left school because I didn't think I could make it. Thank God, in some instances....that almost didn't count.


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